HOW TO STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO NATIVE SPEAKERS

Comparing yourself to native speakers is understandable, but not helpful and here is why:

First of all, what is a “native speaker”? You’re probably thinking about people coming from a handful of countries that have a red-white-and-blue flag, when actually, there are countless more varieties of English spoken by people who grow up using English all over the world, from Ghana to Singapore. So if you’re worried about native speakers judging your English, are you really just worried about Brits and Americans? The world is bigger than that and so is your mind! So stop thinking about native speakers in this limited way. :)

Second of all, there are so many different Englishes in the world, and if your idea of correct English is based on what you remember from your 8th-year schoolbook, it’s time for an upgrade! Go on TED.com or YouTube or anywhere and listen to the great variety of wonderful accents and forms of English all around the world. Can you appreciate how beautiful all of this diversity is? And if yes, can you please stop judging yourself because you don’t have “a perfect British accent”?

And finally, people care about what you have to say, not how you say it. If you can show up fully, freely, happily as yourself and tell us who you are and what you care about? Nobody will be thinking about your grammar mistakes and your pronunciation fails. It’s only if you are unsure and you draw attention to it that people start noticing it. So stop apologising for your “bad English” and connect with the world freely and happily!

Still want to compare yourself to native speakers of English? Well, then let’s:

If you still suffer from ‘comparisonitis’ after this post, it’s understandable. It’s something that sits deeply with us, so please don’t beat yourself up if you don’t manage to just stop caring about this after reading one blog post. And if it’s something that is really holding you back from expressing yourself freely and happily, contact me so we can talk about how coaching can support you break free and speak English with joy!